God, I am a person of many desires and needs and appetites.
Religion has told me to be suspicious of these things.
But now I have become suspicious of that suspicion.
I am not even sure of the point behind prayer.
I do not believe that your job is to take care of me,
Even though I am in so desperate need of care.
I want to reassure you that I am find, that I do not require your help,
But then I realize this is only my anxiety speaking,
And the only one I truly want to reassure is myself.
Someone once told me that prayer changes things.
My skeptical mind would not rest until I agreed that
All the things prayer might change can be found within.
But a world where you do not meet us is a world lacking a soul,
Even though a world where you call all the shots seems capricious
And unpredictable (as unpredictable as the world you watch from afar).
I always seem to come back to that strange and mysterious place
Where all my doubt and fears simply collapse in on themselves
Leaving my only hope, my grace, my possibility resting in you.
Give me, yet again, the daring to trust that love is real,
That you are love, and that you rest quietly in my heart.
Help me to be bold enough to live as if love will always
Triumph in the end. I do not know where this will take me.
But I am willing, even if desperate, to once again take the chance.
